Ask me about women and I quote Jay Z.


Would that my love be a sonnet … blah blah blah.
Just read Shakespeare’s 130th and you’ll see

what I mean when I say, Lord, please have mercy
on me. I like her. What can I say? She rocks

and/or rolls, but it is not my duty to
completely drain her of emotion or her

control over things she says, thinks, feels and does.
No. That would be unbecoming of a guy

like me. What I mean is, I have my hang-ups
and issues too. Foibles, transgressions and sins.

We all got problems, you know? Even Jay Z.
I bet he wants to drive into oncoming

traffic sometimes, especially when she starts
going on and on about Bob Fosse and

how everyone should know who he was. “I
mean, if it wasn’t for Bob Fosse…” … “Yeah, yeah.

Ok, Beyonce. I’m in the Benz … on my
phone … like every other asshole out here.

Can we talk about this later, please?” I bet
she replies with a curt, “Fine,” and hangs up. “You…


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