Where’d we leave off on 5/19? Oh, that’s right.
Ha ha and whatnot about Bob and Kanye.
Tonight I watched my hero on Dave’s last show.
That would be Letterman, from Indi … something.
I’m sure that man went to Ball State in Muncie.
Milan beat Muncie High School in ’55
and Milan’s the team Jimmy Chitwood played for.
Him and Strap, Ollie, Rade, Buddy, Everett.
I know I’m forgetting a few. I know also
that Miss Libbey Schenck played my one favorite
cheerleader in the movie called Hoosiers. Yep.
I removed her from my friends list. It’s over.
That’s fine, man. I don’t mind. Guess it ain’t me, bae.
Bae? That’s what Bob Dylan says instead of Babe
because Babe is a pig, but bae? She’s Babe Ruth.
Charlotte was a spider. I never cared. I
loved that insect more than anyone I have
met. Remember the rat bringing her totems?
Me too. El Oh El. It was funny, huh? Yeah.
Not quite as funny as Bob Dylan on Dave.
Let’s talk about that for just one minute here.
Hey Bob … ever watched The Godfather, Part II?
Remember when Michael pulled Fredo in close,
gave him a kiss and said “I know it was you”?
That’s what Meghan wants to do to you, old friend.
And I? I want to stand there and clap … and laugh.
What I want most is for Her to be happy.
What about You, Bob? What do I want from You?
Nothing, man. Just let me drive your car around.
Maybe let me play guitar, buried like Kris
when he and Johnny took to the stage. Wait … what?
You were expecting poison? But Bobby … why?
Don’t you know you won’t die? And I mean ever.
Bill Murray, too. He was a Ghostbuster, yeah?
But what about me, Bob? What about Meghan?
Can she be your Libby Schenck? I’ll be Ollie.